I was kind of taken aback when I first saw U.S. Senate candidate Steve Novick’s campaign slogan, “The fighter with a hard left hook.” Not to mention his campaign website: www.votehook.com . OK, Novick, we get it: You have a hook for a hand. Now end the war.
Perhaps more political candidates should point out their very obvious differences in their own campaign slogans. Hilary Clinton: “The fighter with a vagina.” Barack Obama: “The fighter who is an underrepresented minority.” Rudy Giuliani: “The fighter with next to no hair.”
But the strategy might be paying off now that officially famous person John Hodgman has mentioned Novick on his blog. Hodgman is best-known as the frumpy “PC guy” in Apple’s “Get a Mac” commercials, but he’s best-loved (by me) for his appearances on The Daily Show and his hilarious fake almanac, The Areas of My Expertise. Hodgman writes of Novick:
AT THE TENDER AGE OF 14 was he sent loose upon the hard streets of Oregon after the closing of his Junior High School due to budget cuts…
(AS YOU MAY KNOW, Oregon regularly ranks very highly in US News & World Report’s annual MOST DICKENSIAN STATE list)
…BUT RATHER THAN TURN TO A LIFE OF HOOK-HANDED PICKPOCKETING, he instead enrolled IN HARVARD LAW SCHOOL AT THE AGE OF 18.
Why, you might ask, does a famous screen actor and humorist give a shit about an Oregon senatorial candidate? Well it’s not for his support of net neutrality or his opposition to the war—it’s because he has a hook for a hand. Among the fake information included in Hodgman’s The Areas of My Expertise is a list of nine presidents who had hooks for hands. Jefferson, for example, “designed his own hook,” while Bush “replaced his hook with a chain saw in an effort to seem less privileged.” So Hodgman writes, “SHOULD STEVE NOVICK PREVAIL and become a US Senator, he would, under obscure Oregonian law, be but A HOOK-HAND FROM THE PRESIDENCY.”
Novick’s campaign website has picked up the story, but seems to be missing the point that Hodgman isn’t really endorsing Novick but his hook-hand. Clearly, the hook needs to ditch Novick and strike out on its own—it’s already got its own website.
OK, Novick, we get it: You have a hook for a hand. Now end the war.
Is that an endorsement? ’cause he needs to be elected first before he can end the war.
Actually, Adrian, if you read the Hodgman piece carefully you would see that the endorsement is based on my campaign bio beginning with a trivia question (which two states have no self-serve gas?). More importantly, the piece also recites the fact that I was lead counsel on the Love Canal case. So the “hard left hook” line has served the purpose of attracting attention … which then leads to people getting more relevant information. (People such as the guy from California who saw the Hodgman piece, then looked at my Web site, watched the video of my announcement speech, and sent $1,000 because he liked what I stand for.) Another purpose of the line is to overcome any discomfort people may have around someone with an obvious disability – hopefully, if I have fun with it, people who might feel uncomfortable can relax. Yet another purpose is to appeal to people who like puns … and boxing fans … and people with senses of humor. So – as long as using the hook line gets more people to take a look at my career and to see where I stand on inequality, health care, global warming, Federal fiscal policy and the war, I’m going to keep using it. Best regards, Steve Novick
I’d say that Novick’s hook is less significant at this point than the fact that he’s the only Oregon Democrat with a “pair,” as we used to say back home.
Novick for Dog Catcher – his true calling. If you like voting for partisan hacks, Novick’s your guy.
Steve will be unknown footnote when the real Democrat steps in to run against Sen Smith.
Until then, please let Steve has his short (no pun intended) 15min of fame.
Just as long as Novick doesn’t endorse PCs over Macs, I’m voting for him!