“Anyone able to help me get the word out about this should know my daughter and her girlfriend will remain anonymous. They can certainly be interviewed off camera, but their names should not be mentioned. Their peers are also intolerant.”
I knew this story would get national attention, and these girls would go public, the moment my colleague Nigel Jaquiss forwarded me this email on June 10. In fact, it took all of one day for the two 14-year-old girls, Maika Rich and Jocelyn O’Neal, to be identified on camera, first appearing on KATU-News. Now, less than two weeks later, they have appeared on national outlets like Drudge Report and CNN.
Of course I’m talking about the now-infamous local incident where two girls got kicked off a TriMet bus for bussing each other.
Here’s more from the original email sent to Jaquiss and several other local media outlets by the mother of one of the girls, Ronnda Zesula.
…”the girls were kicked-off a Tri-Met bus for public display of affection …Though I am not thrilled about watching PDA myself, I know how not to look…Never in my 20 years of riding Tri-Met have I seen them kick such couples off for PDA.”
What happened to these two young ladies was wrong, cruel, stupid and ignorant. If the bus driver gets fired over this, bully for TriMet for doing the right thing.
Now, some of my friends have asked me, ever since this happened, why I haven’t shared my thoughts regarding this incident.
The real reason? It has a lot to do with mom’s email, and how the selling of this particular hate crime doesn’t truly reflect what it’s like to be gay in Portland.
From the moment I got the email, I knew these girls wouldn’t stay anonymous. They had nothing to lose by publicly coming out and everything to gain by sharing their story. In fact, evidence of PDX’s PDA-friendliness is borne out by the overwhelming support they’ve received, not unlike what happens to newborn seal puppies. It was too juicy and easy of a story. And it was easily substantiated: All anyone had to do was check the film that constantly tracks every move inside our local buses to find out if they were telling the truth. Plus it was two attractive young girls attacked by a big, bad, old guy. So that’s why, as of Friday morning June 22, if you insert the phrase into Google, “girls kicked off Tri-Met bus for kissing” you get over 15,000 links to it.
The mom’s original email, continued here, reads like a great non-fiction novel:
He…hit my daughter’s girlfriend’s foot and loudly told them “you girls are disgusting!”…her girlfriend started crying…He then pulled the bus over to the side of the street…(a very busy and dangerous street, traffic-wise) and told them this is your stop and kicked them off the bus at a non-stop location…The girls had to walk to an official stop and wait for the next bus, humiliated. They were on their way to SMYRC, a youth GLBT club in Portland, and were not only late for a meeting with a counselor there but when they arrived in SE they still had about a mile to walk and rush hour is the most dangerous time to walk along those streets.”
Pretty good stuff, huh? I don’t doubt that what happened here shouldn’t have, but to blow it into an international incident misleads those who live outside of Portland, Oregon into believing we are some kind of hick, backwater equivalent of Homophobia-land.
I mean, gawd, do you really think people in Adelaide ,Australia, where this story was picked up by their local press, have a clue of what it’s really like to be queer in Portland? A city that, by the way, goes out of its way to invite queers, and non-queers-alike to hang out here. A city where TriMet’s reaction has been to say it’s “sorry” for what happened and says it will soon discipline the 64-year-old driver for his actions.
Just two weeks ago, I was spending a hella lot of time with a bunch of travel writers here to check out the queer scene for their respective journalistic outlets.
Most of them commented to me, as many have, how easy it is to be openly gay in Portland. That wasn’t our visitor’s association who hosted this group speaking for them. That was their honest opinion. I think they meant it.
But it was sort of erased by this incident and all the attention it has received from the national media. An associate of mine at the Portland Oregon’s Visitors Association commented to me that she has been fielding questions from people across the country wondering if our fair city is really that fair to the glbt crowd.
We need to get a hold of a little more perspective here.
This isn’t how most gays are treated on a TriMet bus. Over the years, I’ve seen plenty of queer folk (mainly girls, don’t ask me why) make out/hold hands/share affections on our public transportation systems. And I too have been treated like crap by TriMet bus drivers for mundane stuff like carrying a coffee cup on the bus. And that incident had nothing to do with sexuality, at least I hope not. I’m not trying to be a cheerleader for our city, the bus system, or any organization that might belittle queer youth. But I have to think that there is something wrong when we live during a time when this becomes a scroll on CNN rather than predictable fodder for our salacious local affiliates during sweeps week.
I respect this kid’s mom for wanting to protect her kid. I am glad that people have responded in support of these two young women. But I think it’s time we moved on to the next “real” news story, and perhaps gave this mother a job in public relations. She really knows how to sell a story.
Photo comes from Katu.com
- Queer Window • The Making of an International Incident [WEB EXTRA
- Update: Now There’s A Kiss-IN!!! Talk abou
- Queer Window • Making Kings [COLUMN]
- Queer Window • Year End 2002– QUEER WINDOW [COLUMN]
- Queer Window • KISS THE GIRLS [COLUMN]
I agree with Byron’s analysis of the situation. This is a horrible display of intolerance and abuse of power, but it really doesn’t go any further or deeper than the bus driver who kicked the poor kids off.
Portland remains as tolerant and welcoming as ever. The real tragedy is for all the gay and lesbian people of the world who read the headlines and get the wrong idea about this wonderful place. They may miss out on a place they could truly feel at home.
Pick any place in the world you can think of and I guarantee you could also find an intolerant person living there. What’s so surprising about that?
Here’s to the mainstream media getting back to the stories that really matter, such as what did Paris Hilton have for lunch today?
So when Bryon decides semantics are important in the legislature it’s news, and Tina Kotek is a Rogue for letting the name change slide, but when young people are treated with disrespect we’re just starting a media frenzy for no reason? Everyone has different issues they care about, why are yours more important Byron?
This is the first time I’ve ever heard of Byron Beck “not sharing his thoughts” about anything.
I don’t care what their sexual orientation is, I don’t want to see teenagers hugging, kissing, laughing, or doing anything! I want them to be quiet, polite, respectful and obedient. If they must ride Tri-met, I want them to observe proper rules of social conduct. They take a seat, they remain quiet and if an elderly or disabled person comes on board they cheerfully stand and give up their seat. As far as I’m concerned, most teens are up to no good and need discipline. I say bring back corporal punishment!
The bus driver is an authority figure and these were children. 14 year old girls. He forced these children off the bus putting them into harm’s way. It would have been very easy for a few guys to follow them off and bash them, because the driver had already demonstrated the worthlessness of these children.
Putting children in harm’s way (Trimet doesn’t allow a minor to be put off a bus without a supervisor’s approval – for the protection of children) normally means the immediate firing of the school teacher, coach, or even mall security guard.
Children shouldn’t be put in harmful circumstances by authority figures, this isn’t a public relations nightmare for Portland – it’s about our children being kept safe by all those who have some responsibility for them.
Byron Beck’s opinion is SO typical of the typical gay person in Portland – "I’m gay and I have not had a homophobic problem here in Portland, so Portland is GREAT for gays!" I can tell you from personal experience he is WRONG! Portland may be more tolerant of LGBT people, but it is no panacea either. I went through nearly three YEARS of homophobic attacks at my place of employment, and I received NO assistance or support from the gay community or gay support organizations because they did NOT want to believe what I was telling them could possibly be true and happening in their precious Portland. It was SO much easier to believe I was lying, than for them to believe the TRUTH, and that TRUTH being that homophobia IS alive and well in Portland as it is in other cities. Portland may be better than other cities, but Portland is NOT perfect and there is JUST as much HARM done by a non-believing and non-supportive gay community as the harm done by the homophobes. It seems to me and other victims of homophobic attacks in Portland that the gay community wants to suppress the TRUTH about these types of hate-crimes so as to bolster the idea that Portland IS a gay panacea. The sooner we accept the FACT that homophobia DOES thrive in Portland, the sooner we will be able to address and hopefully DEAL with the homophobia. Portland IS a WONDERFUL place, but it is NOT perfect and still has PLENTY of room for improvement.
What happened was wrong and yes it was a homophobic reaction to a PDA. The bus driver was wrong.
What kind of concerns me is lack of professionalism we see sometimes on the bus. Eating fritos while driving a bus? Stopping at Starbucks at a non scheduled stop? talking excessively to some riders and not really paying a lot of attention to driving the bus? Talking on their cell phone while driving? For the most part the drivers are pretty good but seems like there’s a lack of discipline at tri met.
everything that happens to gays and lesbians they don’t like or that causes them discomfort isn’t homophobia or hate related…Jesus you he’s and she’s and he/she’s sound like a broken record …It is not acceptable behavior for two 14 year old girls to make out and grope eachother on public transportation …the ultimate authority on where that line is (within reason but he gets to make the call and we get to accept his judgment much like a baseball umpire) is the driver …the safety and comfort of all of the passengers is his responsibility and if the unnecessary conduct or two minors irregardless of their sexuality appears to make other passengers uncomfortable then he can and should warn them once then say buh bye! It was so refreshing to hear from their loving mother who must have been in prison the last 14 years judging by the way she these two 14 year old girls dressed ..Groomed themselves and behaved because no one who was paying attention would have allowed it and no child who was being paid attention to would have needed to make such a statement back. It can’t be said to you people enough times…there are absolutes in this world …there are things that are right and wrong and will always be that way and w8ith the exception of two girls actually making out on a bus …people getting their asses chewed for getting on a bus with a cup of coffee has nothing to do with their sexuality …which is why the alleged plight of the mythical discrimination against the GLBT people of our fair city is not now nor will it ever be even close enough to sniff the butt of racial discrimination on the hierarchy of civil rights issues….because we don’t know who you are !! A person’s behavior unless tastelessly done in public on a bus but usually confined to the privacy of somewhere much more private is not the same as being black 24/7 ….if you can’t tell if someone is gay /lesbian then how can you possibly claim that someone is discriminating against you or worse yet ..Intolerant or homophobic …hello? And what is really hypocritical is the lack of tolerance the people who have whined to the rest of the state for tolerance are of people who don’t share their views …practice what you preach and as soon as gays and lesbians start growing horns or their skin color changes or they begin to exhibit non behavioral unchangeable physical characteristics that make them and them alone easy to identify stop your hate mongering and your paranoid delusions …it just may be possible that you were tortured at work for three years because the other people didn’t like you or you did a poor job at whatever you did …and not because you have sexual urges you aren’t strong enough to say no to. Give that possibility a lap around the track and see how that plays …its always easier to play the victim and never take responsibility for your work ethic or whatever it really might be but you will find that you start to grow as a person if you can look in the mirror and accept some responsibility for your actions…