He’s here. Portland State’s giant rubber viking is here! Granted, he seems to have gained some weight, he’s dressed in white, his rubber face is painted, and he’s wearing the number 23. But otherwise he’s exactly the same. And he’s here at the Rose Garden for the Big Sky Tournament!
And so am I. It’s time to liveblog the game you actually care about. No, not that one. The other one. The #1 seeded Portland State Vikings vs. the #4 seeded Idaho State University Bengals. I feel like I’ve been preparing my whole life for this moment. Back when I didn’t attend Portland State. Back when I didn’t attend any basketball games in high school. Back when I had to look up the name of Portland State’s opponent. Which was five minutes ago.
Still, I’m ready. I’ve still got my trusty press kits in front of me, I’ve got a Rose Garden that’s at least an eighth filled now, and I’ve got a PA system that is almost cutting the “fucks” out of Eminem songs. Let’s play ball!
8:06 pm: If you’ve ever considered reporting on a game at the Rose Garden but declined because you feared there wouldn’t be enough Ranch dressing in the media room, stop worrying: There is hella Ranch dressing in the media room.
8:11 pm: This game (tied at 2) should be easier to find on your TV — it’s on Comcast Sports, channel 37.
8:16 pm: PSU has missed two layups already, and we’re only four minutes into the game. I think they’re a little nervous. And who wouldn’t be? They have a giant tortoise staring at them. 4-3, PSU.
8:21 pm: Holy shit. PSU guard Jeremiah Dominguez just hit a three-pointer, stole the inbounds pass, and immediately hit another three. 10-3, PSU. I can’t believe that just happened. Neither can Idaho State. They don’t even attempt another inbounds; they just call timeout.
8:24 pm: It’s probably worth noting now that Jeremiah Dominguez was the Big Sky Player of the Year. I can see why. His latest three-point attempt barely rimmed out.
8:29 pm: PSU 15, ISU 8. Barack 60, Hillary 38.
8:30 pm: Here’s the kind of thing you don’t learn watching the game at home: There was an extremely minor panic in the press box 30 seconds ago concerning the location of the giant sweat-mop used to clean up the residue of fallen players. Apparently it was sticking out too close to the court. I know this because the Rose Quarter manager next to me was shouting into her cell phone, “The broom is on the floor! A player or a ref is going to get hurt! The broom is on the floor!” The broom is no longer on the floor. PSU 19, ISU 10.
8:40 pm: Let’s learn about Idaho State! The school is located in Pocatello, Idaho, and its team name used to be the Bantams–until 1917, when they decided a tiger was more intimidating than a “small, annoying bird.” They beat UCLA in the Sweet Sixteen in 1977. They trail 20-14.
8:44 pm: He did it again! Dominguez hit another three, stole the ball in the backcourt, and drove for a layup! 27-18, PSU!
8:47 pm: The PSU media guide informs me that, entering the game, Dominguez had 77 three-pointers, two away from tying the school record. He just broke that, and in style.
8:53 pm: And he hits another one. 33-26, PSU.
8:54 pm: Halftime score: PSU 33, ISU 28. I don’t even know how Idaho State scored its points. I’m busy watching Jeremiah Dominguez.
8:58 pm: In fact, I think you should see a photo of this remarkable young man:
9:05 pm: It occurs to me that I probably yell a lot more than most sports reporters. I yell “OH!” whenever somebody steals the ball, I yell “YEAH!” whenever somebody hits a three, and I yell “OH GOD!” whenever somebody steals the ball and then hits a three. (This only happened once, but that’s what I yelled.) I’m probably highly annoying to the professionals around me. But then I figure I’m making up for the countless nights when I’m forced to attend movie screenings with people who talk to the screen. At least tonight I’m not describing what happens to the guy next to me: “HE’S STEALING THE BALL AND SHOOTING AND IT IS GOING IN THE BASKET,” etc.
9:11 pm: I was on my way back from the media room with halftime stats (the Vikings are shooting 6 for 16 from behind the arc) and who should run past me but… Jeremiah Dominguez. The PSU media guide says he is 22 years old and 5′6″. Having now seen him in person, I can tell you this is not true. He is 10 years old and 4′5″.
9:15 pm: Deonte Huff dunks on a fast break, and it’s 38-28, PSU.
9:17 pm: If you went to college in Pocatello, Idaho, and had just one night to spend in Portland, where would you possibly go?
9:18 pm: Oh, right:
9:20 pm: It’s starting to get out of hand. 43-30, Vikings, and the drum team is in full forced and the cheerleaders are pom-pomming and even the little kid with the sweat-mop is exhorting the crowd to stand up and make some noise. And Dominguez just broke up another pass and flung the ball across court to an open man, setting up an easy basket. Which means it’s time to…
9:23 pm: Start making up “Facts” About Jeremiah Dominguez!
9:25 pm: For instance, he cannot feel pain.
9:27 pm: He was born on a nuclear submarine underneath the Arctic Circle. (45-43, PSU.)
9:29 pm: His father is Captain Nemo.
9:32 pm: Jeremiah Dominguez’s nickname is the Dramatic Chipmunk.
9:36 pm: Late at night, when Inuit children are sleeping, Jeremiah Dominguez takes their baby teeth from under their ice pillows and replaces them with freshly harvested walrus tusks. (51-42, Vikings.)
9:40 pm: He dedicates every game to his childhood dog, Lassie.
9:41 pm: Yes, that Lassie.
9:43 pm: While I’ve been making things up, Deonte Huff has continued to have a great game. He had 10 points at halftime, and he may well have scored another 10 here in the second half, mostly by slicing to the basket; he just laid in an alley-oop off the backboard. 60-48, PSU.
9:45 pm: Dominguez just scooped in a driving layup, one handed, from his waist. That actually happened.
9:50 pm: So, what’s the atmosphere like for a Big Sky semifinal game that Portland State is winning by 16? Fairly restrained, actually. It may simply be that the Rose Garden is fairly cavernous space for an event like this; there may not be enough fans to rock the rafters. Yep, that’s definitely it. The fans are plenty enthusiastic (one guy keeps yelling “JEREMIAH” from a skybox and, no, it’s not me) but you can see from the TV that there aren’t many of them.
9:54 pm: Dominguez just exited the game to a partial standing ovation. Huff gets the same response. They aren’t needed anymore: It’s 71-55 with 90 seconds to go. Let’s get ready to foul some Lumberjacks!
10:01 pm: And that’s it! Portland State wins 72-61! I’m off to have a drink with Casey Jarman (I will wish him well at SXSW, and tell him that I’ve gained a newfound respect for liveblogging) but I’ll see you back here at the Rose Garden tomorrow night at 6 pm, when PSU takes on Northern Arizona for the chance to dance. You should really just come to the game. As I may have mentioned previously, there are thousands of good seats available. The magic of Jeremiah Dominguez awaits you.
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